Little White Lies

Written more than two hundred years ago, these lines by Walter Scott remain one of the most well-known excerpts of Scottish poetry: Oh, what a tangled web we weave, When first we practise to deceive!

We all know that honesty is an important value and that lying is wrong, but who can honestly say that they’ve never told a lie? Perhaps we comfort ourselves with the knowledge that most of the lies we tell are “white lies”: little lies that we tell to protect others from the truth.

We’ve all surely had the experience of someone cooking a meal for us that we don’t like. The majority of us of course don’t tell the truth – we lie and say that the food is “delicious”.

Or if a friend asks us what we think of their new haircut, we say “It’s great!”, even if wethink it’s awful. But to what extent can we justify telling white lies like these?

One of the main reasons for telling a white lie is to try to make others feel better. 两百多年前，沃尔特·斯科特的这些台词仍然是苏格兰诗歌最著名的摘录之一：哦，我们编织的网多么纠结，当我们第一次练习欺骗！ 我们都知道诚实是一个重要的价值，说谎是错误的，但谁能诚实地说，他们从来没有说谎？也许我们安慰自己，因为我们说的大多数谎言都是\"白色谎言\"：我们告诉保护他人免受真相的小小的谎言。 我们肯定有有人为我们做饭的经历，我们不喜欢。我们大多数人当然不会说实话——我们撒谎说食物是\"美味\"的。 或者，如果一个朋友问我们如何看待他们的新发型，我们会说\"太棒了！但是，在何种程度上，我们有理由说这些谎言？ 说谎的主要原因之一是尽量让别人感觉

Little White Lies

好一些。However, when we lie and say that someone’s haircut looks good, or when we say that we love a meal that we secretly hate, are we really hoping to improve the situation for someone else? Perhaps we are in fact lying to protect ourselves from the disappointment and anger of others.

Another reason for telling a white lie is to give encouragement. Say for example that your friend asks you what you think of his singing. You of course say that it’s wonderful, despite secretly thinking that your cat can sing better. Stop for a moment and consider that perhaps your friend wants some frank comments from you so that they can improve. Or perhaps, they need to know that they should look for a different hobby.

Finally, we may also tell a white lie when we want to protect others from bad news. If you’ve had a bad day, do you tell your parents about it, or do you hide your tears and lie that your day was “fine”? 然而，当我们撒谎说某人的发型看起来不错，或者当我们说我们喜欢我们暗中讨厌的一顿饭时，我们真的希望改善别人的处境吗？也许我们实际上是在撒谎，保护自己免受别人的失望和愤怒。 说谎的另一个原因是给予鼓励。例如，你的朋友问你你觉得他的歌声怎么样。你当然说，这是美妙的，尽管偷偷地认为你的猫可以唱得更好。停下来想，也许你的朋友想要你一些坦率的评论，这样他们才能改进。或者，他们需要知道，他们应该寻找一个不同的爱好。 最后，当我们想保护别人免受坏消息时，我们也可以说谎。如果你过糟糕的一天，你是告诉你的父母，还是你隐藏你的眼泪和谎言，你的一天是\"罚款\"？If the latter, don’t you think your parents would want to listen to you and understand your feelings? Wouldn’t it be better to respect their concern for you and ask for their advice?

Little White Lies

Going back to Walter Scott’s lines, we may find even white lies have results we cannot know in advance. Perhaps the meal you said was “delicious” will be served every time you visit. Would your friend trust your opinion again if he found out you had lied about his “wonderful” singing? How would you expect others to truly understand your emotions if you only shared good news instead of bad? Moreover, how would you feel if you discovered that the people closest to you had been hiding the truth from you? 如果是后者，你不觉得你的父母会想听你的话，了解你的感受吗？尊重他们对你的关心，征求他们的意见，难道不是更好吗？ 回到沃尔特·斯科特的台词，我们可能会发现，即使是白色的谎言也有我们无法事先知道的结果。也许你说的\"美味\"的饭菜会每次你访问时都供应。如果你的朋友发现你谎报了他的\"美妙的\"歌唱，你会再次相信你的意见吗？如果你只分享好消息而不是坏消息，你怎么能指望别人真正理解你的情绪？此外，如果你发现离你最亲近的人一直隐瞒了真相，你会有什么感觉？